5/13/11

"The Last Night"
You come to me with scars on your wrist
You tell me this will be the last night feeling like this
I just came to say goodbye
I didn't want you to see me cry, I'm fine
But I know it's a lie.

[Chorus:]
This is the last night you'll spend alone
Look me in the eyes so I know you know
I'm everywhere you want me to be.
The last night you'll spend alone,
I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go,
I'm everything you need me to be.

Your parents say everything is your fault
But they don't know you like I know you they don't know you at all
I'm so sick of when they say
It's just a phase, you'll be o.k. you're fine
But I know it's a lie.

[Chorus]

The last night away from me

[Bridge:]
The night is so long when everything's wrong
If you give me your hand I will help you hold on
Tonight,
Tonight.

[Chorus]

I won't let you say goodbye,
I'll be your reason why.

The last night away from me,
Away from me.

Destruction, hence, like creation, is one of Nature's mandates



biting keeps your words at bay
tending to the sores that stay
happiness is just a gash away
when i open a familiar scar
pain goes shooting like a star
comfort hasn't failed to follow so far...

and you might say it's self-indulgent, you might say its self-destructive
but, you see, it's more productive, than if i were to be healthy

& pens and penknives take the blame
crane my neck & scratch my name
but the ugly marks
are worth the momentary gain...
when i jab a sharpened object in
choirs of angels seem to sing
hymns of hate in memorandum

and you might say it's self-indulgent, and you might say it's self-destructive
but, you see, it's more productive, than if i were to be happy

and sappy songs about sex and cheating
bland accounts of two lovers meeting
make me want to give mankind a beating

and you might say it's self-destructive, but, you see, i'd kick the bucket
sixty times before i'd kick the habit

and as the skin rips off i cherish the revolting thought
that even if i quit
there's not a chance in hell i'd stop
and anyone can see the signs
mittens in the summertime
thank you for your pity, you are too kind

and you might say its self-inflicted, but you see that's contradictive
why on earth would anyone practice self destruction?

and pain opinions are sitcom feeding
they dont know that their minds are teething
makes me want to give mankind a beating

i'm tried bandages and sinking
i've tried gloves and even thinking
i've tried vaseline
i've tried everything
and no-one cares if your back is bleeding
they're concerned with their hair receding
looking back it was all maltreating
every thought that occurred misleading

makes me want to give myself a beating....

Self destroyer, wreck your health, destroy friends, destroy yourself. The time device of self destruction, lies, confusion, start eruption.

destruction

The skin breaks,
The blood begins to stream,
I'm wishing, hoping, praying,
This time will wash you out of my mind.
But it doesn'tmy eyes full of tears. full of defeat.
Why do you have to be this way?
Taking every moment of my pathetic life in your hands.
The razor drops to the floor, covered with blood. My blood.
I can now feel the burn from the cut on my wrist, but
A much more potent burning within my very soul because of you.
You say everything will be fine, but it's not.
You say everything will be like it was, but it can't be.
Why can't you see the pain and torment in my eyes every time you look in them?
Now I sit alone in my room,
Crying, depressed,
Wondering, maybe, if the cut was deeper I could get you out of my mind forever.
I hate you. I hate what you have done to me.
You have changed me for the rest of my life.
How can I tell you? How can I make you understand?
My soul is now just a deep cavern where I hide my sorrow from the world.
I look down and see the razor, mocking me
Should I cut again? Will it help my pain?
What will I gain? What can I lose?
I now hold the blood-covered razor to my pure ivory skin,
With one last deep breathe...


Human Destruction

Where distant screams haunt the nights,
And streets are filled with empty homes.
Where starving dogs are left to fight
Over lost men's meat and children's bones.

Where a woman's plea comes to an end,
As a sharp gunshot cuts through the air.
It becomes a normal act just to pretend-
To convince oneself there's nothing to hear.

When the world grows silent
And the candle melts the last wax folds.
And we're I'm left in cold confinement
Left only to tear at my bloodstained clothes.

When the hope burns out
And the last cinder dies.
The world's left with only doubts
Where all you hear are endless lies.

When the air is filled with the stench of death
And the dark blood stains the roads.
And the only choice that now is left:
Is a choice of which no one knows.

When the smoke of burning men fills the air:
A smoke that no wind can fend.
When you take a breath and you declare:
This is when it really ends.

Stefanie Zammit